So this past week has been a little rough..in a nut shell Ethan...starting vomiting Wednesday morning about 3x and I freaked out. I called the neurologist and pediatrician. We went to see the pediatrician...they did a cpc, urine and strep test all came back neg. He said it maybe the shunt but I decided to give it the another day before we decided to CT scans and stuff. Thursday afternoon came and he vomited again 3x in a row and I took him to the ER...CT came back perfect...he had a fever plus not eating( and he loves to eat) and then Friday came more vomiting and FINALLY I LOST IT!!! The pediatrician put him on anti-vomiting med. and it worked until Saturday and decided he needed to a gallon of water and threw up a little. So in a nut shell....I am sad, confused and really really over SB. I don't know how to put it into words....we try to live a normal life without any worries and that just does not exist. I tried to explain it to some other mommies I know. It is one thing for our kids to get the common stomach bug but I guess in Ethan's case I don't stop there because we have to think could it be the shunt or a urinary infection. The unknown is what has gotten to me this last time. Mind you Ethan never really gets sick...6 months to the date. Every 6 months the boy wants to make sure I am on top of things. And I am. I don't want to become this crazy mommie but I see myself not breathing a cleansing breathe at times. For the past few days I have layed in bed thinking of things I wanted to write down on this blog and found myself laying in bed shedding tears. Ethan is the BEST thing I have ever done. He makes me laugh so hard...his determination that he has so inspiring...the FIRE in his belly makes you want to strive to be better because you feel like you are lacking behind. SB is not a curse but a blessing. At times, I have seen it has a huge bumpy road. I have shed tears of pure happiness but at the same shed the same tears of sadness. I will never stop worrying and being on top of my game....because that is who I am. Ethan makes you want to be a better person...I was a lot like Ethan when I met Greg 10 years ago....naive, innocent and a huge dreamer. I still tend to have these atributes, but have come aware of the world we live in.
But, I hope children like Ethan will make this world a better place. So....I guess at the end of day you give your little boy a big kiss on the cheek and tell him " I love you and I will always take care of you" and you take a deep breathe.
3 comments:
I am sorry Ethan has had a rough few days. It would be nice if we could just worry about "normal" things sometimes. Anytime Caleb mentions he has a headache I go into an absolute panic because I think it's his shunt. I hope Ethan gets to feeling better soon, keep us posted.
You are so awesome!! As a family and as a Mother. You ARE doing a great job, Marissa!! And you are doing the right things by jumping to conclusions...we have to.
I can relate...Ciaran had a fever last week but I couldn't figure it out.
Bless you and your family.
I totally know what you are talking about. I wish I could just know my baby was sick, just sick, without worring about UTIs and shut failure, tethered cord, and all that fun stuff. These little ones know how to keep us on our toes!
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