Mama's blog.........She got alittle emotional

I don't very often write about my thoughts and fears or concerns. I come from two very special people. My mother and father did the very best that they could. I think that sometimes they were passionate about the same things but could not find a happy middle. But, by the grace and faith of GOD my brother's and I turned out very normal and well-behaved. Both of my parent's are very happy and feel very blessed to have such GREAT children.
With me turning 30 in the next couple of months..I am reflecting on my past life. I had several chances to become a MODEL....NEW YORK, CALIFORNIA and other major markets were interested in a 5' 10 and 120lbs. girl at the age of 20 years old....but I decided not to purse it. I think that I am talking about this.....only because I am turning 30 in a couple of months and having a mid-life crisis. Ha! Ha! I do not regret how my life has turned out I would not trade anything...I have been dealt certain cards..which I have dealt!!!! My Ethan has brung so many people joy and hope.
I met my Gregory before my 22nd birthday and was swept off my feet....he was alot like my Dad....very charming...etc. Which I admired and still respect to this day. I love my Daddy very much and I worry about him. With him being in Amarillo I don't see him very often but I do talk to him daily. I think at times my father is very glad that my brothers and I put our mother sooo high up in the sky...he knows that we will always take care of her.... as we also will take care of him with all the love in our hearts. My father is my hero and my mother is my hope and dreams....she is a beliver in all things. I got the best of both of them. I have alot of fire in belly and I believe I that trait from both of them...they are both alot more calmer then they were 25 years ago. I hope I am calmer in 5 years!!! Ha Ha I admire and respect both of parents. I have the best of both of them... but you really should ask Gregory about that!!!!!
I don't regreat the choices that I have made. Like I said, I will be 30 in July and I finally believe it is time for me to be a BIG GIRL. I have been a VERY BIG GIRL with Ethan, but I think I need to be a VERY BIG WOMAN. My Daddy always says " I am the apple of his eye".....but I think it is time to pass the torch onto Ethan.
This Tuesday, Ethan will be having his procedure that was scheduled 2 weeks ago.... I know he will do great but I worry sooooooooo much, maybe that's why I have wrote what I have. He is a fighter...and he will prove people wrong.
Thank each of you who read Ethan's blog......